The taming of a Blind GreenEyed Monster
by mesmerizedbyceruleaneyes
Summary: HotaruXAkira; onesided KyoXAkira. Akira tried his best to forget about Kyo, but Hotaru's incessant questions have brought the memories back to the front of his mind, torturing him. The solution? Hotaru helps him to forget. Rated for sexual references.


**Taming of a**** Blind Green-Eyed Monster**

Life on the road in peacetime was, to say the least, quite boring. How was one supposed to train to fight the strongest man in the world – Demon Eyes Kyo – when there's no one worth fighting around? Akira was almost glad when he bumped into Hotaru on the path leaving Edo. At least with the other Shiseiten around, he was assured of a good fight.

Sadly, he was proven wrong. Hotaru never failed to go missing at least once a day, and Akira generally found the fire-wielder observing the actions of a grasshopper or some other similarly strange thing. The other Shiseiten was more inclined to watching clouds scud across the sky than have a bout with Akira. As such, the ice-wielder soon found himself back to his original self-training, except now with half an ear out for Hotaru.

They roamed Japan, much as they had several years ago with Kyo, only now they left no trail of destruction behind save for the disappearance of the highway bandits. It was a relatively comfortable situation for them both, for Hotaru led the way, wandering wherever he pleased, and Akira followed and looked after the other man, fighting when they were in the mood, talking when they weren't, or sometimes just walking in companionable silence when in the mood for neither. Akira sometimes wondered when he had descended to this level – what self-respecting fighter nagged his partner to eat his vegetables, wash his clothes and brush his teeth?

It was a on a crisp evening in autumn that Hotaru, recently retrieved by Akira from a perilous riverbank and now seated on the inn's porch, sprung a question on his unsuspecting companion. "Na, Akira, what do you think of that woman?"

"What woman?" Akira was in the middle of another of his exercises, a sword dance specially developed for his double swords. "If you're talking about the waitress earlier, I _know_ she was eyeing you, and I would greatly appreciate it if –"

"No, not her," interrupted Hotaru. "_That_ woman. Kyo's woman. Yuya. At least I think they called her Yuya. The one with a gun and a short kimono."

"Oh, her. She's –" Akira executed a powerful swing, then sprang back " – alright, I guess. Very determined, for a female, but naïve."

"Doesn't it bother you, to know that Kyo's fighting for her now?" The fire-wielder was leaning against a pillar, looking up at the stars. "When he used to fight for us?"

"He didn't. He fought to be the strongest," said the white-haired male automatically. "He fought for himself."

"Do you really believe that?" inquired Hotaru, his voice quiet but apparently quite serious. "Because I don't. Kyo didn't just fight for himself. He also fought for us – for you in particular, because you had the most to learn. Now he's turned his back on us for that woman."

Akira did not like the direction this conversation was taking. "Just shut up, Hotaru."

"It must rile you, to know that he's taken a woman in our place – in _your_ place,": remarked the other man. "Aren't you jealous?"

"No, I am not. Why would you ever think so?" asked the ice-wielder, spinning as he executed a complicated combination move.

"Because you love Kyo." The statement was made with complete gravity on Hotaru's part.

Akira's landing from his double somersault was off balance; he stumbled but righted himself quickly. "I have no idea what you're saying. Talk sense or don't talk at all."

"But you love Kyo. You tried to get rid of that Yuya woman when you were a Juunishinshou, or so Okuni said," persisted the blonde. "And you protected his body from me. That sounds like love to me."

"How would you know?" demanded the other male savagely, his movements now violent enough to shake the red-brown leaves down from the branches of the garden's trees. "You, of all people, talking to me of love? Don't make me laugh!"

"I wasn't trying to," answered Hotaru placidly. "But really, Akira, I am not as unobservant as you may think. Do you really think I didn't know what you were doing with Kyo those last few months before Sekigahara?"

Akira's cheeks flamed with red spots of rage and embarrassment. "SHUT UP!!" he roared, leaping for the other man with both swords hungry for blood.

"Ah, so you don't deny it." Hotaru's sword met both of Akira's with a ringing clash of steel. "Did it never occur to you that I would notice if my regular nightly visitor suddenly stopped coming to me? After I had been so nice as to share my bedroll with you, when you were sleepless from fear of the bloody nightmares that mauled you while you were defenseless!"

"I stopped having those," said the ice-wielder tightly. "And I was more than old enough to make my own choices!" He leaned his weight on the swords, bearing down on the other man, but Hotaru didn't flinch.

"So you did love Kyo?" murmured the blonde softly. "Even though you knew he was incapable of loving you back?"

Akira was shaking. Hotaru's questions and accusations were bringing back the memories he had tried so hard to suppress, to dam behind walls of determination. But now those dams had been breached, and the recollections flooded his mind, so real as to blot out the present.

Kyo's heat, burning yet somehow also wonderfully warming. Kyo's hands, so rough and bruising, yet at the same time so pleasing on his skin. Kyo's scent, Kyo's teeth, Kyo's manic smile against his skin when Akira came crying out his name under his touch…

No! He didn't want these memories, not when they only taunted him in a reminder that he would never have these exhilarating experiences again! Not when he knew someone else – Yuya, that weak woman Yuya – was the one receiving these, was the one who had Kyo's love!

He had tried so hard to remove her, to get rid of this helpless woman who was clearly a weakness for Kyo. He had even bothered to freeze her as a token of his esteem, for the woman had managed to do something none of the Shiseiten had ever done – win Kyo's heart and render him human – when he could just as easily have killed her on the spot and enjoy the feel of his rival's lifeblood staining his hands. But some strange unwonted instinct had stopped him, had whispered that Kyo would never forgive him if he killed this woman, and so he had spared her.

But she had come back with the help of Sakuya, and in the Mibu castle she had pleaded with Migeira for Kyo's life. For that, Akira was unable to hate her with the vengeance he had anticipated. Once again she had done something he had not been able to do – save Kyo's life. Akira found himself grudgingly accepting that Kyo was in love with this woman and would never return to the demon he once was.

And with that acceptance, he had shoved all those sensual memories of Kyo to the deepest, darkest corner of his mind, and isolated it by burying it in a deep, deep well and sealing it, until the memories were finally forced to lie dormant and silent. Now, though, they rose wild and uncontrolled, raging through his mind and body – every touch, every taste, every sensation roared through him, making him tremble from the sheer force of memory.

"Akira, you're crying." Hotaru's voice, calm as it was, slashed like a blade through the fabric of his remembered reality and pulled him back into the present. "I'm sorry for making you cry. Please stop crying, Akira."

He was crying? Akira froze, trying to revive his reeling senses. Yes indeed, there were wet tracks on his face; his eyes burned. "What… oh."

Something soft brushed his cheeks – a cloth of some sort. It pressed against the corners of his eyes from which the tears were leaking, one side, then the other, surprisingly gentle. "I didn't think you'd cry," mumbled Hotaru gruffly.

"You don't think at all, you idiot," retorted Akira, rather thickly. He sheathed his twin swords; he was in no shape to battle Hotaru, not after that terrible sensory and mental bombardment.

"Um, um, sirs! Is there a problem?" squeaked a female voice – one of the inn's workers, apparently scared stiff from what had appeared to be the beginning of a duel to the death.

"None at all, miss. We apologize for the disturbance," said Akira smoothly, his serene smile back in place. "We will retire to our rooms now for the evening meal, if you would be so kind."

"Y-yes! We'll bring your meal at once!" Quick footsteps receded as the girl hurried away.

* * *

Dinner that night was eaten in tense silence. Akira refused to speak lest the situation be turned on him as it had been earlier, while Hotaru seemed to be content to enjoy the food without talking.

Somehow Akira resented the lack of Hotaru's usual nonsensical babble. It would have provided a welcome distraction from the surge of reminiscing that was currently occupying his mind.

It should really have been no surprise that he couldn't bring himself to sleep that night. Not when ghost-sensations took over the moment he ceded control of his conscious mind, not when he _knew_ he was going to wake up screaming in pain and pleasure…

Time passed; he didn't know how long. Hotaru's breaths came slow and even from the futon next to him. Moonlight shone – he could feel its cool illumination on his face. The futon was pleasantly warm in the frigid air of late autumn. He wanted to sleep, he could feel sleep weigh heavy like a wet wool cloth on him, yet every time he was about to fall, he jerked backwards, unable to bring himself to take the leap into unconsciousness and the vivid sensations and memories that awaited him there.

Fool, he berated himself, you complete and utter fool. What kind of man are you, that you cannot even face the ghosts of your past? Pathetic!

But there had been a time when he had been afraid to sleep, long ago, and the solution was right at hand. Much as he hated to seem weak, hated to be indebted in any way to another, at this point all he wanted to do was sleep without dreaming.

Akira sighed, swallowed his pride, and shifted over under he could slip in next to Hotaru. The fire-wielder was much warmer than a normal human, making the space almost uncomfortably hot, but Akira was used to it – he had slept in this warmth for years.

Moving as close as he dared to the other man, Akira relaxed. Sleep was drawing him in already; this time he did not resist.

Akira spent the rest of the night in deep, dreamless sleep.

* * *

He woke up to the sound of Hotaru's voice. "… could just have asked, you know. What's a body supposed to think, waking up in bed with one's best friend?"

"'m sorry," yawned Akira. He felt wonderfully rested. "And it's your own fault, anyway."

To his surprise, instead of arguing, the blonde (who was sitting up) pulled the ice-wielder up into a hug. "I missed you, you know," he said conversationally. "When you left me for Kyo. It was weird, sleeping without that big ice-block of a person next to me. I had no idea what to do with all the space."

"If you're teasing me, don't do it while hugging me," advised Akira. "I might get the wrong idea."

"But I wasn't teasing. I was really jealous of Kyo," protested the other Shiseiten. "He gets to be a demon, he gets to have red eyes, and he gets to have you too. It was just so unfair."

The ice-wielder smirked. "If I didn't know better, I'd say you're in love with me."

"Maybe I am," mused Hotaru. "What does it involve? Wanting to be with you even when we're doing nothing in particular? Wanting to show you pretty things even though you can't see them? Dreams where I'm not just sleeping _next_ to you, but also t –"

Akira cut him off with a sudden kiss. "Yeah. Something like that."

Hotaru blinked. "Oh. Wow. That was nice. Can I do that again?"

"No. Go and brush your teeth first," ordered the other Shiseiten. "As nice as it may be, it'd be _much_ better if both of us tasted of clean teeth."

* * *

Loving Hotaru was very different from loving Kyo. With Kyo, things that happened in the day remained much the same – an endless round of travelling, killing, drinking sake, killing again, drinking more sake or having a nap, and so on. But at night, instead of just sleeping as they all had in the past, Akira was reduced to a screaming, shivering wreck, at the mercy of the demon's touch and voice.

Now, though, their nights were generally peaceful, but Hotaru insisted on kisses at random intervals, bringing him flowers that he called 'pretty' (they tried to bite Akira's nose off) and generally being twice as eccentric than he had been before. But Akira didn't complain, not much, because somehow curling up with the furnace that was Hotaru every night and being held by the other Shiseiten as though he was something worth protecting made it all worthwhile. Of course, the ice-wielder didn't _need_ his companion's protection (if anything, it was the other way around), but it was the sentiment that counted.

Realizing that, Akira shook his head with a small smile. He was as bad as Kyo with Yuya, so weak when it came to another person. But there was one major difference, one that Akira appreciated. Unlike Kyo with Yuya, for him and Hotaru, there would never be a case when one fought to protect the other – they would always fight back to back, and face the world with a smile that promised death to those who opposed them. Their partner was not a weakness, but a strength.

Eventually, there would come a time when nights wouldn't be so peaceful. But Akira was content to wait. There was a different kind of beauty to each different time and memory. This period of tentative, gruff but well-intended expressions of love from Hotaru was a strong contrast to the explosive passion of his time with Kyo. Both had their own unique beauty. On the road together, wandering aimlessly around the country, they had all the time in the world to create new memories.

They came across Kyo and Yuya once on their journey to nowhere, at a fighting competition organized by the new Shogun, Benitora. Akira found that it was much easier to smile at Yuya and spent a good amount of time in companionable conversation with her. Even when he felt the swell of her belly under his hand and her clear embarrassment about it, he had smiled and congratulated her wholeheartedly. Just because she was happy didn't mean he couldn't be happy too.

"Yuya-san is pregnant. Why didn't you tell me?" asked Akira, that night in the room Benitora – or rather Hidetada – had assigned for them in the Shogun's palace. Being friends (acquaintances or perhaps comrades in arms) had its benefits – they didn't need to pay for a room at the overcrowded inn.

Hotaru grunted. "Didn't think you'd be happy about it."

"So little faith," commented the ice-wielder. "I'm over that; have been for quite a while already. I wonder if the kid will be a good fighter?"

"By the time he's old enough to face us, we'll be old and doddery," grumbled the other Shiseiten. "At least, _you_ will be. _I_'ll be a pile of dust and sparkles."

Akira pulled the other man close, silencing him with a deep, heated kiss. "Enough. Don't think about that. The present is all we need to live for."

Later that night, after a second bath to clean off the remnants of their interpretation of 'living for the present', the ice-wielder smiled to himself as he lay enveloped in the heat generated by Hotaru's body. He certainly didn't grudge Yuya Kyo's love. He had plenty of love right here, and it wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

I'm getting sentimental in my old age, Akira decided, and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

**A/N: My first fic for Samurai Deeper Kyo. I really love HotaruXAkira (come on, fire and ice? They're made for each other!) and when I was looking through the fandom after watching the anime series for a second time (yes I know I must really have nothing better to do), I realized how VERY VERY FEW HotaruXAkira fics there are. At least, HotaruXAkira oneshots or multichapters that have them as the main pairing. So this is my contribution, because SDK really needs more yaoi of this sort XD**

**In the process of writing, somehow Kyo became a sort-of main character :-X it was completely unintentional, but I sorta needed it to bring out the difference when it came to Hotaru. I hope the KyoXAkira didn't cover the HotaruXAkira – after all, this IS supposed to be a HotaruXAkira fic, not a KyoXAkira (though both are quite nice XD)**

… **I love Hotaru. He's so random. ^^**

**Please review! Any feedback is greatly appreciated. Even if the fandom is dead.**


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